Thursday, August 18, 2011

How Many Wipes Does It Take AND The First Give Away

Yesterday, Atticus pooped for the first time in 9 days.

I know, I know.  NINE days.  (!!!!!!!!!)

But I had googled it, and all of the internets I read told me that it's fine since he's still exclusively on the boob.  Breastmilk is so incredibly efficient (magic potion-like, if you will) that there's not a lot of waste, so there's not really a lot of poop once his digestive system figures out what it's supposed to do.  I don't really LOVE cleaning up poop, so I didn't medicate Atticus with prune juice or whatever to get things moving on their way.  He seemed to be fine, and I figured he'd go when he needed to go.

Eh.  Um.  Well.  He went.

He was sleeping so peacefully in his crib during his morning nap.  I was reading about Lizzy McGuire Hillary Duff's pregnancy online, and he started screaming bloody freaking murder.  I thought for a second my super masculine little boy, dressed up in a smocked Anavini outfit and red saddle shoes that I may or may not have purchased off the little girls' sale shelf, had been replaced with a pansy or a little girl, but I quickly realized that something was probably wrong.  It took about .00000092373 seconds to realize, upon entering his room, that he had indeed shat himself.

(This is one of those times that I'd like to thank the inventors of modern day cloth diapers.  I know, KNOW, beyond the shadow of doubt, that one of those disposable diapers would not have held in the lava explosion from Atticus' volcanic exit-only hole.  I KNOW it.   His sheet, cute outfit, and socks were spared.  I only wish the same could be said for my hands).

It was the biggest pile of crap I've ever seen, and I've seen lots of piles of crap.  My brother doesn't flush the toilet, like, ever.

While I was standing over the changing table obsessively counting wipe after wipe, I thought to myself: Self, this would be a great time for your first blog contest and give away! 

The Prize: Do two (2) $10 gift cards to Sephora (or Amazon, if you'd rather have Amazon) sound good to you?  I like Sephora a lot.  I like Amazon too.  I guess you can pick if you win. ;)

How to Enter:  You can enter twice (2 times, for those of you who don't know what twice means).

1 - Leave a comment with your guess as to how many wipes it took to clean up the mess.

2 - Leave a comment telling me how you read this blog.  Do you subscribe via google reader?  Email subscription?  Or do you type in each and every single time you want to see what I'm up to (stalker)?

The Fine Print:  The first person who guesses the correct number (and I've already texted my mom the answer, so I can't lie) of wipes wins a gift card.  If no one gets it correct, I'll spend the gift card on myself.  :)  I'll use or some other random number generator to get the winner of the other gift card.  You have until this Sunday, the 21st, to enter.  I'll post the winner in a blog entry next week, and you'll have 48 hours to contact me with your contact information to get your prize.  10-4?  Over and out.

Good luck.


  1. 1. 27 wipes
    2. I have your blog bookmarked on my iPhone.
    I usually check it for updates once a day while
    side-lie nursing my little guy. :). Love your blog!
    3. Yes I'm adding a third comment just to say I
    also thank the inventor of (good) cloth diapers
    daily. My guy is the opposite of Atticus (he has food intolerances)
    and my BG 4.0s have saved my day (and his clothes)
    numerous times!

  2. 1. 7 wipes
    2. I'm a fellow google blogger and have you on my blog list!! Oh, and I am super impressed that you use cloth diapers.

  3. 1) Im gonna go with 19 wipes to clean the lil guy's tushy
    2) I've subscribed to your blog via Email, and usually check in every other day!

  4. 1. I guess 17 wipes! Ya I win! j/k

    2. I have subscribed to your blog because of the WTE board. I love your sense of humor and you were also my motivation to get started on my blog!

    Side note: How did you get your pictures in your header of your blog? I love it and would like to use a similar style on mine =)

  5. 1. 13 wipes
    2. I read using Google Reader. And I cracked up when you mentioned people looking up your blog address every time because I'm pretty sure there is someone who reads my blog the same way!

  6. Johanna, I used to create the header. I just uploaded the pictures I wanted to use, made a collage of them, and uploaded it to blogger. Let me know if you need more detailed instructions.

  7. 1. I am gonna guess 12 because I don't really have a clue lol
    2. I read using google reader.

    btw my brother does not flush either! eww!

  8. 1. 15 wipes. Yuck.
    2. I am on the march2011 wte board! I need to
    Add you to my blog roll. I also cd and love
    It. My son is five months on the 25th this month.

  9. 1. I guess 9 wipes.
    2. I'm a WTE March Mommies and I start typing www.thehagaboaters....... Until it comes up in the Internet history.

    Seriously tho, I'm with you on cloth dipes. No poosplosions here!

    P.s. Seeing as though you do many things that are "attachment parent-y", I'm curious to know why you aren't attachment parents. Want to share?

  10. Lauren, I'll post about that and other FAQs tomorrow. :)

  11. Ashley- How is Atticus napping? Is he on a regular routine? I cannot get Luke to nap in the morning longer than 45 minutes...

  12. Oh and I read the blog first via email

  13. 1. I'm going to guess 12. Dang, that's a lot.

    2. Your blog is on my blog roll.

  14. This is too funny. I'm going with 7, and you know you're on my Google Reader. :)